is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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