The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize