I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize