sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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