I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
She told me I should be a condom model.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
