I wanna passion pit in your ass
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
