"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Actions speak louder than pants.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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