No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize