how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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