I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
