my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
