The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
