What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
only if we run a train.
done.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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