Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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