He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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