Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
operation harelip BJ is a go
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Randomize
