I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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