Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
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