life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize