with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize