BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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