i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
