Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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