Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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