Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
