Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
