We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Randomize
