Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
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