he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
