Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
