Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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