Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize