I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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