Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize