I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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