okay pat passed out under dana's car
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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