Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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