it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
