For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize