i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
