New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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