Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
why is half of my head shaved?
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