I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize