I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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