She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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