we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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