she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
