Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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