watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
