So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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