we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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